Have I Told You Lately that I Love You?

Dear Parishioners,

I have been involved with Worldwide Marriage Encounter for well over to 35 years.  (To see exactly how a celibate priest like me fits into this community, you will just have to make a Marriage Encounter weekend!) The Marriage Encounter community has shaped me as a person and has helped to direct my priesthood and the ministry flowing from it. I have learned (and am still learning) many valuable lessons to apply to myself and my relationship with others as a result of my many years of participation.

For example, one simple lesson is as follows: We can sometimes take people for granted. Those around us every day—whether they are family, co-workers or friends—can unfortunately get lost in the busyness or shuffle of everyday living. We can occasionally assume that others know how we feel about them. We neglect to tell them that we “love” them, that we care for them or that we appreciate them. As a consequence, people can get hurt—albeit sometimes unintentionally.

What can we do to try to avoid this from happening? Take the time to tell your husband or wife that you love him or her. Embrace your children and let them see how much you love them by spending time with them and by telling them that they mean the world to you. Compliment a co-worker. Call a friend and tell him or her how much you appreciate his or her friendship. Don’t take people, especially your spouse, for granted!

We can apply this thinking also to our relationship with God: tell Jesus how much you love Him, His Father and their Holy Spirit. We should try never to let a day pass where we fail to acknowledge the presence of God in our lives!

On another important note, the second Sunday of February (last Sunday) is annually designated as World Marriage Day (having been established by Worldwide Marriage Encounter). In 1983, this day was “designated as a day to honor the husband and wife as head of the family, the basic unit of society. It salutes the beauty of their faithfulness, sacrifice and joy in daily married life.”

As the traditional definition of marriage is challenged, and there are increasing attempts to redefine it, go back to the teaching of Jesus in the Sacred Scriptures as a point of reference:

Jesus said . . . “Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, no human being must separate.  (Mt. 19: 4-6)

Marriage is sacred. It is one of the seven sacraments of our Catholic Church. As something divinely instituted, it needs to be respected and defended.

Finally, since theologically, I share the same bride as Christ as His priest (i.e., the Church) I want to make sure that I heed my own advice and not neglect my spouse! I hope that I never forget to tell you this: I love you, my parishioners, my spouse! I also hope that I never neglect you or take you for granted!

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

Spending the Weekend with Worldwide Marriage Encounter

Dear Parishioners,

I am away from the parish this weekend presenting a Worldwide Marriage Encounter Weekend at the Holiday Inn, Cherry Hill. 

During a Marriage Encounter Weekend, a team of three couples and a priest, present a series of talks to couples (and sometimes to priests and religious) with the goal of making good marriages better. The Marriage Encounter Weekend is not primarily designed for troubled marriages. It is meant to open up the lines of communication between husband and wife in what is essentially a private experience between the husband and wife.

When I was a newly ordained priest, a couple from my parish asked me to make a Marriage Encounter Weekend. As you might expect, my reaction was somewhat puzzled. I am obviously not married. What would be the benefit for me attending such a weekend?

Over 35 years later, I can honestly say that this experience (and especially its aftermath) had one of the most profound and lasting effects on me as a person and on my priestly ministry. This is probably not something that I would have chosen to do on my own. It would certainly not have been on my bucket list. Yet, what happened as a result can only be described as truly life-changing. And it was thanks to a couple who simply asked me to try such an experience. Like the couple that invited me, I extend an invitation to any married couple to consider attending a future weekend.

 

I have been presenting the Marriage Encounter Weekend, usually once or twice a year, for over thirty-five now. Our team wants to help strengthen marriages and give couples a set of tools to face the many challenges that our world holds for marriages and families. For further information, you can check out the South Jersey Worldwide Marriage Encounter website or call the information line at 609-741-8012. (For couples experiencing serious and difficult marriage problems, there are alternate experiences such as Retrouvaille for this purpose.)

Many people are afraid of the unknown, afraid of change or may not want to “rock the boat.” Why not take a chance and ask your spouse to consider the possibility of attending an upcoming Marriage Encounter Weekend?

I can tell you from personal experience that it has had life-changing possibilities on me and on so many couples who have attended over the years!

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

Is Your Marriage Ready for Some Fine Tuning?

 

Dear Parishioners,

I have been involved with the Worldwide Marriage Encounter community for approximately 35 years. The Marriage Encounter community has shaped me as a person and has helped to direct my priesthood and the ministry flowing from it. I have learned (and am still learning) many valuable lessons to apply to myself and my relationship with others as a result of my many years of participation.

During a Marriage Encounter Weekend, a team of three couples and a priest, present a series of talks to couples (and sometimes to priests and religious) with the goal of making good marriages better. The Marriage Encounter Weekend is not primarily designed for troubled marriages. It is meant to open up the lines of communication between husband and wife in what is essentially a private experience between the husband and wife.

What it did for me personally was help me understand married couples (and their families) better, help me open up lines of communication, help me better understand my relationship to the Church—the Body of Christ—and also to understand my feelings. Feelings, in particular, are not something most men know how to deal with or choose to deal with at all

Ladies, have you ever felt that your husband sometimes doesn’t seem to understand you? Guys, are your wives sometimes still a mystery to you in many ways? Do you both ever wonder if there is more to life than what you are currently experiencing? Then maybe it’s time to try a Marriage Encounter Weekend. You can be newly-married or married for fifty years. It does not matter. The weekend can help to make any marriage better.

I am scheduled to be the presenting priest for a Marriage Encounter Weekend from Friday evening September 29 to Sunday, October 1. The weekend is being held at the Holiday Inn right here in Cherry Hill. If you are interested and want to join us, the contact couple is Michael and Marge Walsh and they can be reached at 609-741-8012.

As the traditional definition of marriage is challenged, and there are increasing attempts to redefine it, we should refer to the teaching of Jesus in the Sacred Scriptures:

 

Jesus said . . . “Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?  So they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore, what God has joined together, no human being must separate. (Mt. 19: 4-6)

Marriage is sacred. It is one of the seven sacraments of our Catholic Church. As something divinely instituted, it needs to be respected and defended. A Marriage Encounter Weekend is designed to help that married relationship grow. I invite our married couples to investigate what this weekend is all about!

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

An Advent Weekend with Marriage Encounter

 

Dear Parishioners,

Advent originated as a fast of forty days in preparation for Christmas. This weekend, for the Second Sunday of Advent, I am presenting a Worldwide Marriage Encounter Weekend in Ocean City, NJ.  Please pray for its success.  

When I was a newly ordained priest, a couple from my parish asked me to make a Marriage Encounter Weekend.  As you might expect, my reaction was somewhat puzzled. I am obviously not married. What would be the benefit of me attending such a weekend? 

Almost 35 years later, I can honestly say that this experience (and its aftermath) had one of the most profound and lasting effects on me as a person and on my priestly ministry.

This is probably not something that I would have chosen to do on my own.  It would certainly not have been on my bucket list. Yet, what happened as a result can only be described as truly life-changing.  And it was thanks to a couple who simply invited me to try such an experience.

I have been presenting the Marriage Encounter Weekend, usually once or twice a year, for nearly 35 years now.  Together with a team of three couples, we share a series of talks to couples (and sometimes to priests and religious) with the goal of making good marriages better. The Marriage Encounter Weekend is not primarily designed for troubled marriages. (There are experiences such as Retrouvaille for this purpose.) The Worldwide Marriage Encounter Weekend is meant to open up the lines of communication between husband and wife in what is essentially a private experience between the two.

What it did for me personally was help me to understand married couples (and their families) better, to open up lines of communication, to understand my relationship to the Church—the Body of Christ—and also to identify and communicate my feelings. Feelings, in particular, are not something most men know how to deal with or might not realize the importance of in the first place.

Ladies, have you ever felt that your husband sometimes doesn’t seem to understand you?  Guys, are your wives sometimes still a mystery to you in many ways?  Do you both ever wonder if there is more to marriage and to life than what you are currently experiencing?  Then maybe it’s time to try a Marriage Encounter Weekend.  You can be newly-married or married for fifty years or more.  It does not matter.  The weekend can help to make any marriage better.

If you are married and desire more for your marriage, I invite you to consider attending such a weekend.  For further information, you can check out the South Jersey Worldwide Marriage Encounter website or call the information line at 609-741-8012. 

Many people are afraid of the unknown, afraid of change or may not want to “rock the boat.”  I invite you and ask you to suggest to your spouse the possibility of attending an upcoming Marriage Encounter Weekend.  

I can only tell you from personal experience that it indeed has life-changing possibilities! 

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

Married? How’s your Relationship?

Dear Parishioners,

When I was newly ordained, a couple from my parish asked me to go on a Marriage Encounter Weekend.  As you might expect, my first reaction was somewhat puzzled.  I am obviously not married.  What would be the benefit of me attending such a weekend?

Over a quarter of a century later, I can honestly say that this experience (and its aftermath) had one of the most profound and lasting effects on me as a person and on my priestly ministry.  This is probably not something that I would have chosen to do myself.  It would certainly not even be on my “radar screen.”  Yet, what happened as a result can only be described as life-changing.  And it was thanks to a couple who simply invited me to try such an experience.

For approximately twenty-seven years, I have been presenting the Marriage Encounter Weekend usually twice a year.  Together with a team of three couples, we present a series of talks to couples (and sometimes to priests and religious) with the goal of making good marriages better.  The Marriage Encounter Weekend is not primarily designed for troubled marriages.  It is meant to open up the lines of communication between husband and wife in what is essentially a private experience between the husband and wife.

What it did for me personally was help me understand married couples (and their families) better, help me open up lines of communication, help me better understand my relationship to the Church—the Body of Christ--and also to understand my feelings.  Feelings, in particular, are not something most men know how to deal with or choose to deal with at all

Ladies, have you ever felt that your husband sometimes doesn’t seem to understand you?  Guys, are your wives sometimes still a mystery to you in many ways?  Do you both ever wonder if there is more to life than what you are currently experiencing?  Then maybe it’s time to try a Marriage Encounter Weekend.  You can be newly-married or married for fifty years.  It does not matter.  The weekend can help to make any marriage better.

If you are married and desire more for your marriage, I invite you to consider attending such a weekend.  The next two weekends that I am scheduled to present are October 17, 18 and 19, 2014 and December 5, 6 and 7, 2014 (beginning on Friday evening) at the Golden Inn Hotel and Resort in Avalon.  For further information, you can check out the South Jersey Worldwide Marriage Encounter website (http://wwme-southjersey.org) or call (609) 742-4035.

Many people are afraid of the unknown, afraid of change or may not want to “rock the boat.”  I invite you, and ask you to suggest to your spouse the possibility of attending a Marriage Encounter Weekend. 

I can only tell you from experience that it indeed has life-changing possibilities!

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

Worldwide Marriage Encounter Convention in Atlantic City

Dear Parishioners,

This past summer in Atlantic City the national convention of Worldwide Marriage Encounter took place.  Couples and priests from around the United States and Canada gathered to be part of this exciting event.

Over twenty years ago I was asked by a married couple to go on a Marriage Encounter weekend and I agreed to give it a try.  Naturally I had some reservations–the main one being that I was not married—but to this day I think that making the weekend had one of the most profound impacts on my life and on my priesthood.

What I learned on the weekend was the importance of relationships and communication.  While I will never claim to be anywhere near perfect in my personal relationship or in my communication skills, I have learned some valuable tools that have helped me in this regard to try to see the good in others and to try to understand where others are coming from.  It doesn’t mean that I always agree with others or that I always have the right insight into every person or situation.  However, I continually try to put relationship over issue so that the person and the relationship are more important than any issue or situation.

After all, if we don’t try to build and maintain relationships I truly think that we have our priorities in life out of order.  God has been revealed to us as a Trinity of persons in relationship.  There is a Father, a Son and the Holy Spirit who are harmoniously unified yet distinct persons in the one, true God.  From the example of the Trinity together with the teachings of Sacred Scripture, we learn that we as created humans are distinct unique individuals who make up the Body of Christ.  There needs to be unity and peace and not dissention in that Body.  Consequently, we must always be working on stronger, better relationships with one another based on the Love of God for us.

That is why attacking people, belittling them, and trying to hurt them will never be the correct way of dealing with people from a true Christian perspective.  We are taught to love our enemies and to pray for those who persecute us.  The teaching of Jesus in Sacred Scripture is very clear on this.

So work on those personal relationships whether they are with your husband or wife, your children, your co-workers, your priest or deacon, your next-door neighbors, the person that you may not like or talk to, etc. etc.  Treat them with kindness, love, respect and forgiveness.  Do to them what you would want them to do to you.

Again, I echo the words of St. Maximillian Kolbe, my patron saint:  “Only Love is creative.”

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

Priesthood Anniversary

Dear Parishioners,

On May 16, 2010 I celebrated my 23^rd anniversary of Ordination to the Priesthood.  It has given me the opportunity to reflect on the Ministerial Priesthood, on my current assignments and on the many people who have touched my life in the process.

On the underside of my personal chalice I had the following inscribed:  Lord bless all those who have brought me to and keep me at your altar.  Every day when I approach the altar I bring my people (you!) to it.

The Letter to the Hebrews tells us:  “Now every high priest is appointed to offer gifts and sacrifices. . .” (Heb. 8:3)  As I offer the sacrifice of the Mass each day I realize that I am not worthy of this great gift that was bestowed upon me.  I ponder constantly why God called me, why did He place me where I am right now, and why are certain people in my life right now.  I trust that God in his infinite wisdom knows the answers.

I shared with a brother priest not long ago that if I had to do it all over again I would.  I love being a priest and I will be eternally grateful to God for this magnificent gift.

Have there been difficulties?  Most certainly there have been and still are.  Yet I will attempt to stick to this principle until the day I die:  The relationship is always more important than any issue. 

Yet when I reflect on the many good, holy people who try to be Christ-like and charitable, loving and kind, merciful and forgiving, these far outweigh all others.

Thank you for your continued prayers and loving support.  In my human weakness with all of my sins, faults and failings, as a priest who acts in persona Christi, I promise to continue to love you, my spouse, the Church. 

Thank you for loving me.

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

Would You Like to Meet My Spouse?

Dear Parishioners,

When I was a teenager I used to ask God to give me a good wife.  (Yes I have to admit that even as a teenager I prayed—how embarrassing!)  It was a sincere request that I find someone to be happy with for the rest of my life.

I am now a Roman Catholic diocesan priest.  Generally, we don’t marry and promise celibacy.  Did God not answer my prayer?  I’ll let you be the judge.

I was warned by many people to be careful of what I ask for in prayer—I might get it.  Remember I asked for a good wife while at the same time I felt called by God to priesthood.

“Hey God!  Aren’t You listening to me? Good wife.  I realize that you’ve been around for all eternity.  Is Your hearing starting to go?  Good wife.  W-I-F-E.”

Then, of course, I entered the seminary and studied theology.

·         Theologically, the priest stands in for Christ when administering the sacraments.  We act in persona Christi.

·         Scripturally, Christ has a mystical bride—the Church.

For no one hates his own flesh but rather nourishes and cherishes it, even as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.  “For this reason a man shall leave (his) father and (his) mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”  This is a great mystery, but I speak in reference to Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5: 29-32)

The Catechism of the Catholic Church confirms this as well:  The Church is the Bride of Christ: he loved her and handed himself over for her. He has purified her by his blood and made her the fruitful mother of all God's children (808).

Suffice it to say that as a priest acting in persona Christi I have the same spouse that Christ does—the People of God, the Church.  God appears to have answered my prayer in a way that I did not expect, giving me the best bride that there could be—His own!

Yes, sometimes in my life there may be moments when I ask those what if questions.  What if I didn’t become a priest?  What if I got married?  What if I had a family of my own?  Yet, after these 20+ years of ministerial Priesthood I’m glad that I answered God’s call.  I can honestly say that I would do it all again.

And so, although I don’t have one individual to spend the rest of my life with, I still have a spouse—the Church—to accompany me through life’s journey.

Yes, I sleep alone.  But I look on the positive side—no morning breath to face as I wake!

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor

Marriage Encounter Weekend

Dear Parishioners,

Shortly after I was ordained a priest, a couple from my first parish assignment invited me to go on a Marriage Encounter Weekend.  That request may sound a little bit ridiculous to you, at first, as it did to me—obviously I was not married!  However, I remember being told in the seminary not to be afraid to try to experience various activities like this one to see what it was like.  So I decided to go.  I didn’t know much about what was going to happen but I still went.

The experience was one that changed my life and my priesthood profoundly.  Over twenty years later I am still involved with Worldwide Marriage Encounter and despite my many other pastoral duties I continue to present these weekends annually.

Marriage Encounter claims that it helps to make good marriages better.  I believe that it does that and more.  The result certainly can vary from couple to couple but I rarely see couples who really give the weekend a chance not have something significant come out of it.  For some the weekend is profoundly life-changing!

How are things going in your marriage?  Has it become routine?  Does it seem like the initial spark is flickering or missing altogether?  Do you long for a deeper intimacy with your spouse?  Do you just want to spend some quality time with each other?  Why not think about making a Marriage Encounter Weekend?

Without going into all the details, I can tell you that the experience is personal and private between the individual couple.  It doesn’t matter how long you are married—from newlyweds to those celebrating a major anniversary.  All that is needed is a willing couple who wants to make their relationship and marriage better.

What was the last thing that you actually did to improve the quality of your marriage relationship?

Here’s an opportunity for you.

Fr. Ed Namiotka

Pastor